click the red heels

I took my heart on a journey today
of old houses
old friends
dusty memories
childhood staring at me with with age lines yet famliar eyes
i glanced at 4410
the outside looked different
but the inside still held mamas voice
and my heart
i know this because I could hear it beating even a block away
Peter's Bakery window
gave a knowing glance in my direction
recalling the sunday morning walks with mama to buy fresh conchas
i'm brought back to the present
holding the hand of a childhood friend as she let go of the hand of her husband's remains
listening to the priest say earthly goodbyes
as i watched grief cast her eyes downward
i sat helpless,
wanting to take her pain in my hands
and wipe away her tears
but instead i found myself comforted
by ageless faces who called me mija
and looked at me as if i had just danced out of their back yards
with mud stained knees and puppies at my heels
6-year-old friends
in bodies of 46
remembering being children
while bragging of our own
i walked away from good-bye hugs
with a heavy heart
knowing i'd rather be walking back to the bakery..
waiting for rosie to get home
wishing i didn't have to have the memory of her being so sad
and wondering about the people in the old house

they say you can never go home again..
i have to disagree..
time and distance may take you away
but a part of you never leaves..